Lessons from The Turbulent, Roaring 20’s

Part 1 (The Early 20’s)

A few days ago I turned 30. I cannot even believe it. Where did the time go? If you want to know how old 30 is, look at all these other things that are turning 30 this year. In a recent TED talk Meg Jay, author of “The Defining Decade” stated that our 30’s are not our 20’s and that we all need to stop thinking our lives are an episode of GIRLS and get our lives together. I happen to like GIRLS and I think that even if we have it together in one area, very rarely do we it all have together in every area at the same time. Even know, I feel like I’m always working on some area of my life or adjusting to a new change. However, in my early 20’s, I did think I had to “have it all together” and the anxiety over having it all, made me rush into the milestones of adulthood.  

In hindsight, my 20’s were all about the growing pains of becoming an independent individual. Most of us leave our teen years carrying a lot of baggage, and the expectations of our well intentioned parents. At some point it’s hard to distinguish between what we want for ourselves and what others want for us. After high school, we are thrust into adulthood after choosing a college and then pressured to choose a major that will allegedly determine what we do with rest of our life.  After college we have to at least pretend to have our life together. Because no one wants to end up the poster child for one of those articles that talks about how Millennials all suck and are never going to do anything worthwhile with their lives except build an impressive stock of Instagram photos. 

There are lots of things to navigate in your 20’s and I could have used a survival guide. Here’s a few truth’s that I learned after surviving this roaring and turbulent decade that might help you get through these times.

1)      You Will Make Mistakes- Even the best of you will mess up and that is a beautiful thing as this is the only way you will grow as a person. This is how you will know that certain things are not acceptable to you and most importantly after thriving and surviving your mistakes you will know that you can wither any storm that comes your way.

2)      Your Life May Not Go According to Plan-  Accept that the things you want now will change and that even if you achieve the perfect job, relationship, life, you may find that it’s not as great as you thought it would be and that its time to move on to other things.  The sooner you let go of “the plan” the sooner you can figure out who you really are and where you want to go next.

4)    You Will Need a Support System- Believe me that YOU WILL NOT MAKE IT OUT ALIVE without a support system. Friendships are challenging, because your friends know all your issues and frankly they are probably tired of hearing about them and your inability to deal with them. That's normal but it doesn't mean they don't love and appreciate you. Friendships evolve and go through different phases that is just life, get used to it, it will be good practice for your late 20’s when all of your friends meet their “soulmates”, have babies/dog babies , move away for graduate school or a fabulous job. But true friends will always find a way to stay in your life.

5)      Deal with your Issues Now ( Ignore this at your Own Peril)- I read this quote in Thought Catalog about your 20’s that rang very true: “In your twenties, if you have any amount of complexity in your childhood, or any trauma that you haven’t dealt with, it comes out. “Every awkward Sally Draper moment in which you realized your parents were human and every unresolved instance of lost innocence comes crashing down on you.  Just remember that being confused about all that is normal and having unresolved issues is too. It’s important you recognize whatever “your” issues are and you start working on them now.  At the age of 20, I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder and it took me very long to not feel ashamed about that and to start finding ways to manage the feelings that overcame me rather than try to pretend they didn’t exist.

6)    Enjoy Your Body- Enjoy your body in your early 20’s, because sometime after age 25 you will notice a decline. Getting drunk won’t seem as fun when your hangovers last 48 hours. I will never forget the first under eye wrinkle I saw at the age of 27 under the fluorescent lighting at Forever 21.  Please do enjoy and also take care of your body now. (Also can someone tell me at what age it becomes unacceptable to even walk into Forever 21? My friends and I can’t seem to come to an agreement on this issue.)

7)    Keep Your Financial House in Order- One day you are just a kid and all of a sudden you’re in college and there’s these things called FAFSA and they are asking you to decide what kind of loans to take out. Meanwhile, depending on how you were raised you don’t even know your social security number. This is the time to start educating yourself on these issues, it is also a good time to learn how to make a budget and stick to it. After graduation the car my dad had purchased for me broke down suddenly and I learned very quickly that with my credit score I didn’t really qualify for a loan that didn’t come with a very high interest rate.  I hope you make better decisions than I did. Look at sites like mint.com and learnvest.com that help you make a budget and teach you about personal finance issues like how to build a good credit score.

8)      A Word on Romance- Yikes, I could write a book on all the things I did wrong in this department. From infidelity, to chasing the wrong boys, to holding on to the ones I didn’t like for my own selfish needs- I pretty much covered a lot of territory in a short amount of time. It’s hard to capture any “advice” because we all learn and evolve differently on these matters.  Here’s what I can tell you, when we are young we fail to consider that the things we thought we wanted are not the things we need to feel content. We are too young to know that things that at first were non-issues can become deal breakers. Worse, we don’t realize when we are in relationships that don’t suit us and we ignore that inner voice that tells us that something is not right.  I don’t consider any of the things I did mistakes, but rather that it took guts to let go of people who weren’t right for me so that we could both seek a better match. Every person that touches our life leaves us with a lesson. Maybe we don't see that lesson at first but eventually we see the gift they left us with.

And Finally:

Don’t feel pressured to figure it all out in your 20’s because life doesn’t end after 29.  Embrace the turbulent and transformative nature of your 20’s.  Sometimes we want to things to look a certain way or work out in a way that makes life less messy, this way we don't have to keep searching and we don't have to deal with the inner turmoil lurking inside us.  Allow yourself to feel the pangs of the uncertain; these feelings let you know that you’re alive.  Those feelings of uncertainty never fade and if they do it means you are being too safe and that is no way for any of us to live.

      Xoxo,

Betsy Aimee 

Movie Review: What We Can Learn From Girl in Progress

Thanks to Latina Bloggers Connect I received an invitation to attend a screening of “Girl in Progress.”  It had been a long time since I was so moved by a film and so immediately invested in the characters.  The story demonstrates the complex nature of mother/daughter relationships but it also demonstrates how our relationships with family, friends and ourselves are constantly evolving.  Eva Mendez and Sierra Ramirez gave life to beautifully written characters under the direction of Patricia Riggen.  As a Latina I cannot help but feel incredibly proud of this movie, but the message it leaves the audience with transcends ethnic boundaries.

The movie focuses on a young girl and her desire to separate from her mother by eliciting her “coming of age” experience.  I promised this post would contain no spoilers so I won’t delve into too many details!  By the end both of the women in the film have made progress, but just like in real life, things aren’t perfect.

Looking back, I relate to the naïve precociousness of the daughter in the film. I once thought that life transitions could be uncomplicated and that the ties that bind us to those we love could be easily broken. I  thought that my “coming of age” would bring an end to the confusion, messiness and uncertainty of life. I now know that even when we have experienced our “coming of age” and have transitioned out of our adolescence we never stop learning and we never stop growing.  

This movie allowed the main characters to be flawed, vulnerable and even unlikeable at times which is a rarity these days. A lot of us struggle to achieve a false ideal of womanhood because we are afraid of the imperfections, and flaws lurking just underneath the polished exteriors we work so hard to maintain. I know many times I held my own mother to a very high standard and even now constantly berate myself for all of the things that I am not.

Living up to our own false expectations of what life should look like is sometimes the hardest thing to let go of. When we realize that we are never really complete, that there is never an end to our growth perhaps we will start to appreciate the beauty of being women in progress.

I for one know that I will always be a woman in progress. Watch the movie and you may have an epiphany of your very own.  Take your mom, your sister or your best friend, you won’t regret it.

Xoxo,

Betsy Aimee

Cinco De Mayo Special: Being Mexican is Awesome

Today is Cinco de Mayo and based on the promos and paraphernalia at Party City you would think that Mexican culture is all about Coronas, mustaches and sombreros. Well yes, those are elements of the culture. But there is definitely more to it than that! As a first generation Mexican-American (well technically i'm half as my mother is Guatemalan) I never felt the need to learn about my culture as it was all around me, in fact I spent a good part of my life trying to escape the elements of my culture I disliked or didn't identify with.Now that I am older I have learned to appreciate my Mexican side a lot more. Here are some reasons why Mexican women are awesome:

1) History of Strong Women- I really reject the notion that Mexican women are submissive and bow their heads to their men. Thus I had to search for different role models of what being a Mexican woman was all about and thanks to my mother I discovered Frida Kahlo.

Frida Kahlo: 

Frida sufferred a terrible accident at a young age that could have destroyed her spirit but her will to live, love and succeed was stronger than the pain she lived with as a result of the accident. She managed to seduce and marry Diego Rivera, a man who could have easily overpowered her physically and professionally. Even after his infidelities, Frida stayed true to herself and got even (watch the movie or read this book to know more), she wasn't afraid to live on her own terms, have controversial beliefs and be sexually liberated at a time when most women didn't dare to. While she loved Diego in the end her she got the last laugh as she eclipsed her famous husband and has become the most well-known and revered Mexican artist. LOVE HER!

Maria Felix: 

The biggest star of Mexico's Golden Age of Cinema, Mari Felix, was the Mexican Liz Taylor. She married 4 times, and always personified a strong, indomitable women on film and in real life. She also happened to be incredibly beautiful and proud of her Yaki Indian ancestry. She also wore Christian Dior and was featured in best dresses lists throughout the world.

Her personality and spirit are demonstrated in this quote: 

"I cannot complain about men. I have had tons of them and they have treated me fabulously well. But sometimes I had to hurt them to keep them from subjugating me."

2) Fearless Fashion Sense-Have you ever watched a Latin award show? Mexican women are not afraid to flaunt their curves and bring on the color and the bling. Look at Friday Kahlo and Maria Felix (above) does it look like they were afraid to accessorize?  Here's one of my favorite Mexican actresses, Jacqueline Bracamontes in Oscar De La Renta. She's the epitome of refinement on every occasion and she has the most amazing hair. It's also always great to see a red carper filled with with women that are not primarily thin, blondes. 

What do I wear on Cinco de Mayo? Now that you know why Mexican women are awesome. Here's a Cinco de Mayo Outfit for you to flaunt out on the town tonight! Notice the bold color in every piece and the statement necklace. The point is to incorporate elements of the colors associated with the Mexican flag, not to actually look like a flag. Of course these pieces are versatile enough to be worn after tonight too.  All of these items can be found at Forever21.com

So let's not forget that I was born and raised in the U.S and like any real American I will be celebrating Cinco de Mayo tonight with a shot of Tequila. Being bi-cultural provides you with SO many drinking opportunities. How do you observe the day? What are your favorite things about Mexican women? 

Feliz Cinco de Mayo! 

xoxo

Betsy Aimee 

The Power of Many

Eastside Career Chic in Office A La Mode

I have some exciting news to share!  These past few days have just been great as I was fortunate enough to contribute to one of my favorites sites, The Daily Muse not once but twice! After that I was asked to contribute to another site I love that focuses on Empowering Latinas-New Latina. For someone who a few months ago just dreamed of being a writer this is a HUGE accomplishment.  I titled this post the power of many because so many of you have emailed me or mentioned that you have read my blog posts. Others of you have given me helpful feedback and assured me that this blog is a good idea. I thank you for everything!

I am also happy to report that my colleagues and I started a blog a few weeks ago and it has just been oodles of fun! After months of complimenting each others outfits we decided to start putting it out there for the world to see. We realized that we love our fashion bloggers but we just cannot imagine posting outfits on a daily basis like they do and besides our blog will have something for everyone as our styles and body types vary. I will be posting outfits in Office A La Mode every Tuesday. Here goes our contribution to the fashion blogging world. 

I can't wait to see where this goes.

Welcome to Office A La Mode! Click HERE to see more.

xoxo
Betsy Aime

Eastside Career Chic: In the Daily Muse-Bloggers I LOVE!

Last week, the Glitterati of the fashion world traveled to New York City for the most important time of the year: Fashion Week! It’s hard not to love the extravaganza that the week brings, but truth is, most of us can’t come close to affording those designer labels. Let alone show up to our weekly staff meetings wearing looks straight from the runway!

Luckily, we have fashion bloggers—the talented, creative, and super-stylish women that help us adapt high-fashion looks to something appropriate for the cubicle lifestyle (including our very own corporate attire experts, Cubicle Chic!). Get out of your black slacks and a button-up rut and get some workday inspiration with this list of our favorite office-appropriate fashion bloggers:

Read the rest of this article by visiting:
The Daily Muse

My Feminine Mystique...

One afternoon, I sat in my living room and looked around at my belongings. There was the large cabinet that held souvenirs from my adventures working on Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign. There was my book collection (organized by size and color), the college degree I had worked so hard to obtain, and a display of carefully selected photos with my friends and loved ones.

But as I stared at all these objects, the symbols that represented the life I had created for myself, I sobbed inconsolably. From the corner of my eye, I could see a hardcover copy of Betty Friedan’s The Feminine Mystique. I recalled Friedan’s writing about the unhappiness that plagued middle-class women of the 1950s and 60s. I never thought I would relate to these women, who, on the surface seemed content, yet upon closer inspection, were miserable. Friedan called it “the problem which has no name.”

I knew I had a problem, but unlike the one Friedan wrote about, mine did have a name: depression.

Read this article in its entirety by visiting The Daily Muse

Self Help for Skeptics

I have recently started seeing a new therapist/life coach. Yes, she’s expensive. Yes, she’s worth it!  This week we were discussing my shopping addiction which is exemplified on several blog posts, like this one. We were talking about the giddy feelings I get when I buy myself something pretty, and she said that maybe I should create a personal mission statement and that I should reference it before I purchase something to make sure it fits into what I want in life. Personal mission statement? Yeah that’s for nerds and optimists. 

That made recall a training I did a few years ago where I went through a series of exercises that led me to create a mission statement but back then I secretly scoffed at the idea as it sounded like something people who take themselves seriously would do and I am not that kind of gal. I reviewed the mission statement I wrote on that day and clearly much has changed in the past 2 years. Not only this time rather than being skeptical I was kind of excited about developing a mission statement, probably because I have now embraced my inner self-help nerd. 

I started doing research and I was relieved that others have already written eloquently on the subject!  Classy Career Girl, Anna Runyan explains that her mission statement helps her keep track of what she wants to achieve with her blog. She's awesome and I loved this mission statement she shared so much that I featured the image on my blog (see above) Your personal mission statement then will help you keep track of what you want in life. I started working on my own mission statement and relating it back to what my therapist said, that I should make it a tool to keep in the back of mind whenever i’m making small or large decisions. I love writing about myself in 3^rd person! Here goes my first attempt:

To live without fear, pursue my passions, embrace my personal style, achieve the ideal work-life balance, meet my spiritual and health needs, while creating financial stability that will alleviate stress in my middle age.

Here’s what I found out about myself in this short exercise:

• Financial stability- Is important –NOW, I used to pride myself on not caring about money, I have realized that money gives you options and I want more time to do all the things I cannot afford to do now like travel and shower my family and friends with nice gifts. Oh and boring stuff like retirement. 
• Personal Style-I should ask myself next time I buy a pair of shoes if they are indeed helping me embrace personal style or just a momentary desire that will only hinder my ability to meet my other goals.
• Work-Life Balance- I never thought this was an issue until I realized that working 10 hour days is no way to enjoy life.
• Spiritual and Health Needs-Again things I didn’t care about at 21, F*ck i’m old.
• Pursuing my Passions- This blog is one step in that direction. Never thoughts writing would be a hobby. I had to have a breakdown (see work-life balance or lack thereof) to finally start looking for a creative outlet. 

Clearly I have changed my mind on the personal mission statement. However, I am still on the trajectory to embrace other useful tools that are meant to help map out the road to achieving the lives we want to lead. Check out this book for more exercises to help guide you and this great quote from said book:

"Some people don't just live: they lead a life. They don't sit around waiting for a lucky break. They create opportunities. They go after their dreams and bring them to life….

Why does this matter? Because we only live once silly. So do like the ill-fated lovers on the Titanic, and make each day count!

What’s your personal statement? Try to write one, I promise it's easy and you may learn something about yourself!

If you liked this post PLEASE comment, subscribe or follow me on (the) twitter @betsyaimee.

XOXO

Betsy Aimee.

We All Need to Find Our Place in the Universe

According to Wikipedia the term niche is used to describe the role an organism or population plays within its community or ecosystem. Niche marketing often refers to advertising that is tailored to appeal to a specific group of people. Niche Audience is the people that fit within that said group of people.

It’s like those ads on the side bar of your Facebook that seem made just for you and say creepy things like , “Are you a 26 year old woman living in Los Angeles?” and you think, “Well actually I am! “ This is the most obvious example of advertisers targeting to a niche audience. Some things are marketed to the “mainstream niche” and are meant to appeal to all consumers but increasingly ads are developed for specific groups of people. This is why Facebook and Google will one day inevitably rule the world as they have so much data on everyone that they are the perfect venue for advertisers to create very specific ads based on all of the data we put on the internet.

Advertisers know that in order to sell they have to tailor to who they want to sell to. This got me thinking about my niche and who my target audience is, who am I appealing to, and who would be interested in what I have to say on this blog.

Taking it one step further I asked myself why I continue visiting certain Fashion, and Career sites, what is it about who they are marketing to that keeps me coming back? For example, when a blogger or a site features only high end designer gear I find myself not visiting that site as often. If the clothes I see don’t seem accessible to me it makes it less likely I want to visit in that case I’m not part of the niche audience of that blogger.

Now some bloggers who are a bit more savvy understand this and so they frequently post, less expensive options so that people like me don’t get turned off this is why I always read, “The Chloe Conspiracy.  This is an example of trying to appeal to a “mainstream” niche.

Now neither of these options are bad and perhaps bloggers are not always aware that they are carving a niche for themselves but it’s essential for their success that they establish an audience, figure out what it wants and then blog accordingly.

The same rule can apply to our careers, we need to find out what we like, who would like the service/product that we can provide and then tailor accordingly. Mold your career to who you are and then surround yourself with people who will appreciate it.

I’m still searching for my blog’s niche audience, but for this week my niche is finding cute nail polish!


It’s important for all of us to know who our target audience is, at work and in life and message accordingly. If you’re reading this it’s likely that you are a member of my niche audience so please do remember to subscribe, comment and follow me on Twitter!

This Blog Post Will Change Your Life!

Source: piccsy.com via Michelle on Pinterest

One of the best things that has happened since I started this blog is that I have found so many other sites and blogs that inspire and excite me. Every evening I come home and methodically click through my favorites bar. If you want to see some of my daily reads click here.

Of course 90 percent of my thoughts while I do this are something like this:

"Wow, she's so pretty. I wouldnt look that great in that outfit"
"Well she doesnt have a Full time job etc. like I do so that's why she looks that cute"
" I wish I could dedicate more time to being a "writer/blogger" so that I could incorporate all these great ideas I read on IFB into my blog

Then after a while I get tired and then just shut off the computer and say to myself,
"Now i'm too tired to blog"

Finding inspiration isn't hard for me, it's getting motivation to share what inspires me with others.
Here's a picture of my magazines which inspire me to find new outfits for the office!

I'm almost ashamed to admit this is only one months worth of glossy peridiocals. I have loved magazines since I was little girl. I think I was the only 11 year girl who read Seventeen Magazine and also played with paper dolls.

This week one of the sites I follow New Latina posted a question their site, "My ideal job would be _______"  I posted a response saying, " My ideal job would be to blog about careers and fashion"

Side Bar: My current job as a member of the women's rights movement isnt all that bad! But hey I am an overachiever so 2 careers would be awesome, and hopefully profitable.Besides I strongly feel that Gen Y (those born between 1980-1991) will have many careers and that the days of doing one job for the rest of your life are long gone. But that's a whole other topic for another day.

New Latina, asked me if I already had a blog or was thinking of starting one. I responded with the link to this blog and I was esctatic when New Latina posted my most recent blog post to their Facebook and Twitter! Woo hoo! That was exciting but it also made me ponder on why I just cant do what I claim I love to do on a more consistent basis. I have blogged about this in the past and have discussed this phenomenon with others.

The creative mind behind New Latina, Angelica Perez-Litwin is a great example of doing what you love and sharing your gifts with others. She is utilizing her psychology background to motivate other women and at the same time has created a platform of self expression for other women trying to share their "gift" with the world.

What does it mean to "share your gift." It sounds incredibly self-help-ish (yes, I just made up a word) but your "gift" is that unique talent you possess, that perspetive on life, fashion, music, politics, etc. that can only come from you.

(Speaking of gifts, looks this adorable wrapping paper)

Source: junelily.com via Flo on Pinterest

For example, to the naked eye, most fashion and beauty blogs might appear to be the same but  according to this Ted Talk on how to have a successful blog it is that unique perspective on trends and fashion that others connect with and makes them want to come back to your blog.

I hope you feel some connection to the thoughts I share here and that's why you are reading this blog. If that's the case then you should suscribe or comment! (or maybe it's just because you are my friend or my family member)

At the end of her talk she cites this quote by T.S Eliot that she shares at the end:"Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.”

The blogger who did this TED Talk, Andy Torres of Style Scrapbook found herself unemployed after moving to Europe to pursue her dreams of being a designer and then realized that her true gift was to take runaway looks and make them relatable for the everyday woman and now has an incredibly successful webiste and career as a stylist.

Now dont tell me you dont think you have gift. We all have a gift and even if you dont know immediately what it is, part of our challenge is to find out what it is. If you havent found it already now is the time to start looking. But in order to do so we must take a risk and get out there and find it.

If we reallly want to change our lives we need to get out there and find our gift!
How many of you have things that inspire you? How are you sharing your gifts with the world? Where do you find the motivation to do what you love?  If you start searching today I will guarantee this post will change your life and if in Steve Jobs case he radically changed the lives of others in the process.

xoxo

Betsy Aimee.

Invest in Yourself, Just Make Sure There's a Return on Your Investment

Everyday we are confronted with a myriad of financial decisions...
"Should I stop for coffee?"
"Should I eat the lunch I made at home or hit the nearest burger joint?" Guess how I usually answer  that question, :)
"Does the dog really need a new outfit?" Rational Answer: No!
"Should I shop around for gas or just go to the nearest place when I run out of gas?"
"Should I agree to loan (insert name of friend/relative) money?"

In case you're wondering these are actual decisions I have been confronted with recently.

In this era of consumerism and where people are always looking for the next best gadget- Ipad 2/Iphone 101 anybody? - to keep up their image, it is very difficult to make decisions about how to spend money that can be truly unique and independent as we are constantly being subjected to targeted marketing that was designed specifically for us based on age, race etc.

And then there's the stuff we search for late at night....

Exhibit A- I have been obsessing over You Tube make up tutorial and beauty videos. They are inmensely addicting to someone like me. I have loved Make-Up ever since I was old enough to dig through my mother and older sister's make up. Now that I have emerged from the valley of the shadow of Depression I have re-discovered my love for face painting.

These videos are the budget shoppers guilty pleasures.  It's great to learn about beauty products and they prevent you from having to buy products that are overpriced, inadequate or who do not keep their marketing promises.
Yes of course, these videos help me save money!!
I think they could if I didn't have a compulsive need to buy things.

See below here is my newest nail polish purchased on a late night binge at my local drugstore. After all glitter polish will continue to be a top trend in 2012.

If we could graph the incidence of cosmetic product purchases after I watch these videos we would see a direct cause and effect relationship. I wont tell you what I have purchased in the past few weeks for fear of judgment (but I did post a picture of everything above) and also because I havent completely abandoned the idea of starting my own You Tube channel to share my "hauls" in the hope that I will soon become the next You Tube sensation.

I am fascinated by this phenomenon as these You Tube beauty experts are gaining momentum and cosmetic companies are definitely taking notice. In this video, one of the gals I enjoy shows off the drawer of the stuff that gets sent to her by cosmetic companies. I would lie if I said I wasnt jealous

I wouldnt publicly admit to following her but there's this young gal who has over 100 million hits and has recently hired a PR firm to represent her and is clearly trying to capitalize on her You Tube fame by coining herself the "Fashion Icon of the Social Media Generation."  Her readers sometimes  argue about her credentials as a fashionist/beauty guru in their comments section but she's clearly making a living this way. 

But there's more to this a few years ago it would have seemed outlandish but these young gals are actually good career role models because they are doing what they love and turning it into a profession and incorporating into their lives.  They are also following Penelope Trunk's advice and branding themselves as experts. in their fields by using social media and creating a following.

 This is something that all of us could learn from to advance our careers and the importance of investing time to pursue what we love. Investing in ourselves is key to getting ahead whether that means buying cosmetics and uploading videos, seeing a career coach, or my favorite investing in a killer wardrobe that will help make you more confident at work. 

Where does that leave me and my potential You Tube Channel idea. I have a lot on my plate and I look fat on camera but I will definitely keep considering the Yout Tube venture. Mostly because then my cosmetic obsession can be considered an investment in my future! Doing something you love is never a waste of time because it contributes to your personal happiness an that is of course the best investment money and You Tube can buy.  For the time being please keep reading this blog. I promise to share the goodies as soon as they start coming in....

Why I Hate New Year's Resolutions

Source: facebook.com via sophia on Pinterest

I hate New Year's resolutions.. I mean who needs another reason to feel bad about the many things they dont do?! Dont get me wrong, it's not like my life is perfect. In fact on January 1st I immediately came up with a list of resolutions and  on February 2nd I was already failing to keep them and thus I gave up on the whole idea. One of those included blogging more frequently.

Instead I think we should take January to reflect on the many great things we accomplished in 2011 and how we will continue to build on those successes. Think about what made you happy last year and make sure you continue to do that. Here are some of the things that worked for me in my quest for personal development:

1) Try New Things: It sounds like a no-brainer but it is easy to come home everyday after work and sit down in front of the computer, and on weekends you sleep in, have a few drinks and then get ready to do the work week all over again. I have driven myself crazy with this routine for quite sometime. Last year I finally took a creative writting class and was completely scared of having to read my work in front of others. But it felt great to finally do it! Think about what you want to try that are you too afraid or to lazy to try and make 2012 the year you do it!

2) Keep Going Even if Not Everything is Going Right: Last year had many ups: vacations, celebrations, new home etc. But there was also things on the personal front that just didnt work. However, I plowed through the bad days and enjoyed the good ones. That's the only way I kept my sanity and even though it's only January 7th I already know I will need that same resolve in 2012.

3) Read about people who share your interests:  I am interested in career, personal hapiness, and fashion so that's what I read about. Make sure you have a hobby or something that interests you outside of work. I love Penelope Trunk as she writes about careers and personal developments. No really, you should read her! She wrote a great blog on what is trending in 2012.  This will get your creative juices flowing.

4) There's Always Room for Improvement: I just bought a new home and have seen that the remodeling process will pose challenges for me and for my relationship. "What do you mean you aren't finishing the floor this week?!" Just when you think you have overcome one hurdle life seems to throw you another. I need to work on my gratitude because no matter how great my house is I cant get over the fact that it doesnt look like what I want to look. This is just bratty behavior on my part as this is really a great home that needs some love and care. I really need to work on my outlook life. As someones who suffers from depression this is quite a feat, but im not giving up without a fight! :)

If you want a full life remodel I highly reccomend the New York Times Best Seller, "The Happiness Project." In this book she takes a whole year to work on different aspects of her life. It's a great, light read and there's even exercises to create your own happiness project.

5) Challenge Yourself- This year I plan on creating more looks with less clothes and use more recycled clothing ie- used/vintage. This is my Style Challenge 2012. I did a great job on honing in on my personal style in 2011 and I will be taking it the next step in 2012.

Someone famous said, "A life unexamined is not worth living" Examining every day is exhausting (I should know) but just make sure you are in the drivers seat in 2012!

The moment I gave up on blogging everyday I actually blogged. Woo hoo!
xo,
Betsy Aimee

There's Always An Excuse To Not Do What You Love

Wow! I have been a bad blogger. The days have gone away from me and one week of not blogging turned into two, then three and here were are almost one month later.

Every week I kept creating excuse for myself as to why I wasn't posting. Geez I cant even keep up with my hobbies.

I have a confession though, I have actually been doing way TOO much shopping lately. I'm so ahead of the shopping curve, I have my holiday party outfit and my NYE outfit! See below.

 I just kind of knew from the moment I saw it much fun is to be had in this dress!  I am throwing caution out the door about excess lbs and will hopefully be ringing in 2012 with this little number. You can find this dress and many mofre fun NYE pieces at Arden B!

I digress. I love my blog and the self expression it allows me. Then why is it hard for me to blog? Ok lets keep on looking at the clothes.


I made a wish board earlier this season. It was a fun little arts and crafts projects which consisted of me cutting out my favorite looks from magazines, pasting them on cardboard. It has helped me focus on only buying the pieces I really, really, really want/need. :)


On my board was a printed dress that was in a neutral pallete but still fun. I found this perfect dress on Piperlime.com. This was again love at first sight...You can still find it at Dillards. This dress is great with heels and a blazer for work, and can be worn with booties and fun jacket on the weekends.
Most recently I wore it with my favorite BCBG Boots and Navy Tights on Thanksgiving!

My November shopping adventure continued on Asos.com. I found the perfect secretary blouse in Leopard! Which if you ask me is the new black!!!  I wore it with black skinnies, booties. For work I wore it with a cream colored skirt and black pumps. But really this goes with EVERYTHING. haha.

Ok. So im kind of all over the place but really I did not want to go another week without posting. Besides I am actually all out of excuses!!  While you're out at it check out one of my new favorite bloggers over at Cupcakes and Cashmere

Have A Great Week!

xoxo

Betsy